{Toxic} Relationships

                     Today I’m sharing on the topic of “toxic” relationships!

We ALL have them in our lives --> they are the people/relationships in your life that you may or may not constantly be around. They can be family members, co-workers, acquaintances or even someone you’d call a close friend! Whoever they are, their words or actions either hurt you, bring your spirits down or just provide an awful dose of downright rudeness when it’s totally unnecessary.

Whether their comments are small or large, they can hurt and COMPLETELY derail you from the joyful life you were put on this earth to live. My husband and I have experienced this first hand and have over the last couple of years really focused on finding those positive people and relationships to surround ourselves with and ignoring the “noise” and negativity of the toxic ones. 

A little over two years ago we took a HUGE leap of faith and moved across the Pacific to Maui, leaving ALL family, friends, acquaintances, EVERYONE! We knew TWO people here in Maui, they were the sweet couple who moved over here with us. Those were the only two people we knew. Dave & I both grew up in a towns where you’d run into someone you knew every single time you left your house, so this “knowing not-a-single-person” thing, made for an interesting twist in our lives. When we moved, HUGE transformations happened in both of our lives and our marriage. We lost a combined weight of 100lbs, we COMPLETELY changed our eating habits, our views on health, our thoughts on family, our relationships with ourselves and each other and the Lord. We realized that even though we lived a pretty fab life in Oregon, we were not living the life intended for us… The move to Maui was exactly what we needed to CHANGE out of the toxic habits we held! The Lord has done a work and there are no words to describe how amazing I feel and how thankful I am for that work. 

After about 6 months here, after we had our “transformation” ;) Or whatever you want to call it… We started looking into the relationships we had back in Oregon and ones we were making here and realized how many toxic relationships we had in our lives. Not always was it a toxic person, but it was the way we carried a relationship with them or how we handled ourselves around them, it wasn’t healthy. We weren’t friends to them and they weren’t friends to us. It was just toxic, stagnant, no give. When we saw how much changing our mindset had transformed our whole lives it was crucial to look back and see what exactly the root of our issues were and how we could fix them. Most of the relationships have been healed due to us changing and the other person never even knowing there was an issue... Other relationships have had to be mutual, where both parties had to take a step back to get to the point where they feel comfortable and confident to step back in. Then sadly, there are relationships that just didn’t work out. You do what you can, but obviously not EVERYONE can or wants to be your friend and vice versa! 

It’s important when you’re {cleaning up} your relationships that you realize, it doesn’t have to get nasty. You don’t have to say everything bad they did or rub their mistakes in their faces. Handling it with love and respect is the best way to go. It’s inevitable that people will come and go in your life… THAT’S LIFE! Sometimes there will be a relationship that will be OH SO hard for you to give up, but they don’t respect you or support you or give you the love YOU deserve. {Those are the toughies} But I can’t stress the amazing feeling it is to get rid of the negative and surround yourself with positive, uplifting and respectful people. People who cheer you on, even when you’ve set a CRAZY goal. People who are there when you fall, even if you’ve fallen 100 times over the same issue. People who laugh with you and don’t talk behind your back. People who will tell you the TRUTH with love and help better you. Be open to criticism, but don’t let people walk all over you. Be open to change and positivity. Your life, goals, dreams, mindset, relationships, health and wellness depend on YOU to be open to having healthy relationships and positive fellowship. 

I REALLY wanted to share this because it’s been a HUGE help in my life, to know my true friends and be okay letting some go. I have rock solid relationships with people who LOVE me. I have best friends who I’d do anything for and they would do anything for me. I have friends who are closer to me even living 2000 miles away from them than people who live down the street. Living a balanced, healthy life is my goal and making sure my friendships and relationships are balanced and healthy aligns with that goal and makes for a pretty happy ME :)

XO Hannah