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Wednesday, March 20, 2013

We're Pregnant


Say What?? Yep!! It’s true! 



                                         We're Pregnant!



After 7 blissful years of marriage my hubby and I are expecting our first child. Baby S is due in October!

Let the Shock Sink in...


We found out on January 28th, 2013 and I can be honest-- We were surprised! Telling our family and friends, we noticed, everyone around us was more excited than we were... I felt bad, like I am the worst female ever! Aren’t you suppose to be excited, joyful, happy about such a blessing?? Where are my maternal instincts and when do they kick in?? Well, it took a few weeks.. Actually, a little over a month for the idea of “being pregnant” or the thought “we’re gonna have a baby” to sink in. It was a bummer, I wanted to shake all the negative thoughts, but they clung to me like a static-y dryer sheet!

Here are a few thoughts that went through our minds during the few weeks of “shock” after we found out... 
-We have NO family here, how are we going to get help?! 
-We still have TWO years of school here in Hawaii!
-Maybe the tests were false positives? Should we get another?
-Are you sure that's a REAL baby on the ultrasound screen?
-How are we going to afford this (on a student budget)?! 
-We live in a studio with JUST enough room for us and our two dogs, we’re gonna have to move!
-What will the dogs think? 
-How’s Grizzly going to handle the change? 
Dave: What about our trip to Europe next summer?
Me: OMG- I’m gonna be HUGE (Super selfish thought, I’m aware)! 
Dave: Did we even want to have kids? 
Me: NO! I didn't think so?! 
Dave: How did this happen? 
Me: Well-- When a boy and a girl like eachother...
Both of us: Oh My GOSH, we are having a baby!

These were just a few of the life altering thoughts frantically running through our over-stressed minds. 

I’m not sure if a lot of first time parents deal with these same feelings about baby/pregnancy... I have just known so many people who’ve wanted a baby and they try and try, so when it finally happens they are overjoyed and excited. I also think of my friends who've lost their babies and how devastated they were. I almost felt guilty for just "getting pregnant" so easily. In the beginning, we clung to the phrase “The Lord’s timing is perfect” and "He never gives you more than you can handle" Because we know the Lord is good, faithful and He ALWAYS makes a way! 

This IS Happening, Let's embrace the bump!


Skip forward to just a couple weeks ago, we started really embracing the idea :) Getting amazing long-distance support from friends and family, local support of friends here on Maui and because it’s starting to SHOW in daily life --> in my growing tummy, urinary frequency, aversion to meat or anything cooked in olive oil, crazy mood swings, unsatisfiable hunger, insomnia, heartburn and sleepiness. 

Today, I’m officially 12 weeks. There are still days every now when I struggle and think, oh no, what’s happening?!? BUT, there are WAY more days where Dave and I are excited about Baby S, we talk, plan and get excited about expanding our cool little family.

Watching my tummy grow is definitely exciting!!




:) Listening to the baby's heartbeat and seeing Baby S on the ultrasound are amazing experiences. Getting maternity clothes and baby blankets, birthing books and baby advice is fun! Receiving more LOVE than I could have ever imagined on FB, twitter, texts, Emails. I've had HUNDREDS of likes, comments and love from everyone and it makes us feel SO special ;) THANK-YOU

Hannah, How Are You Staying Healthy?

The truth comes out-- YOU know I don't lie and wouldn't keep my downfalls from you, just as I don't keep my successes from you! I'm human & pregnant, so if you want to judge-- Shame on you ;)

When I found out I was pregnant, I went Cray-Zy! I got super down and depressed, anxiety was high, stress was even higher. I put all of my healthy ways on the back burner and just ATE-- I did this for almost 4 weeks! AND in those four weeks I gained 9 lbs!!! Uugghhh, I was so disappointed with myself when I stepped up on the scale-- I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT! And the thought, "Oh I can lose that in a couple weeks!".. Doesn't work when your pregnant! The good part about the first 4 weeks was that I popped my pre-natal daily, so Baby S got his/her vitamins and minerals even though mommy was being bad.

Over the last few weeks I've gotten back on track and it feels Oh-SO-Amazing! Eating my veggies and fruits, getting my work-outs in, managing my emotions the HEALTHY way! YAY for me :) 

As my first trimester comes to an end, I feel like the 2nd and 3rd trimester will be amazing. I'm aware feeling ginormous may not feel amazing, but the choices I make from here on out will be exactly what I need to get through this and ENJOY it. I'm hoping to still stay on track with my weight gain even though it was cray-cray in the beginning. I really want to be the person who embraces pregnancy, my changing body and motherhood. I strive on positivity and as you can see from the beginning of this post-- Positivity was not on my side and the negativity brought on nasty side effects. The Lord is good to me and had blessed me SO much in this life, I know He's ready to bless Dave and I again and I'm excited to see everything come to pass!

More updates will follow!!  

xo,

Hannah